Entry #19 - 12.10.5502

The morning after 3.14 and 101's return from ancient Egypt, we all gathered in the mess for a celebratory breakfast of cheese omelets, cheese fondue, cold pizza (triple cheese) and, for dessert -- leftover cheesecake (the rats have something of a one-track mind when it comes to food). The question of "what happened" in Giza was tabled till after everyone had had their fill of lactose, and the dishes were cleared from the room.

"OK, 101, spill the beans!" Athena demanded in a good-natured tone, as the dishwasher roared to life in the kitchen.

"Well...um...ya see...um...it's, it's..." the little rat began nervously, clearly not relishing the idea of having to tell his tale.

"I bet it has something to do with the cult of Bastet." 14/2 interrupted. "I've been doing some investigation on the subject of Egyptian history, and it would seem that, just after 101's visit, a strange cult involving thousands and thousands of mummified cats sprung up -- and Earth historians were always at a loss to explain it!"

"And you think 101 had something to do with it?" Mar asked from her end of the table.

"Well...?" 14/2 replied, raising his eyebrows and glaring over at 101, beseeching an answer "Did you or didn't you?"

"Well...um...yeah, I guess...um...but ya see...um..." 101 began stammering in response, before 3.14 finally cut him off.

"The answer is 'yes', he was responsible for what resulted in the mass execution of many thousands of ancient Egyptian cats." 3.14 affirmed. "But to be totally fair, it wasn't entirely his fault. And besides which, it's just cats we're talking about here, for goodness sake!"

"But it's history that was effected," 50-50 clarified, "which is very serious, regardless of whether or not the injured parties happened to be sworn enemies of us rats."

"So what exactly happened and who - or what - is 'Bastet'?" Athena now asked, bringing us back to the question at hand. All eyes turned to 101 for an answer, but it was 3.14 who finally related the story...

"As you may remember, it was late in the day when 101 disappeared from the Telepods lab and transported back to the fabled 'land of the Pharaohs' -- late in the day and none of us had had anything to eat since breakfast. So, not surprisingly, the little guy was plenty hungry when he landed in a sand dune alongside a temple granary. Now, to be fair, how was he supposed to know the grain was considered 'sacred' -- was being kept as an offering for the Egyptian's gods?"

"Yeah, how was I supposed to know." 101 piped-up in self-defense.

"So, finding an opening in the stones near the granary door," 3.14 continued, "he squeezed in and sat himself down for a little snack. Unfortunately -- and unbeknownst to our little friend here -- the Egyptians were in the habit of keeping cats in the storehouse to protect the grain against rodents."

"As if their imaginary gods would go hungry for what we eat!" 45 joined in. "It's just so typical of hominoid-centric theocratic societies!"

"Give it a rest, 'Chairman Mouse'!" Mar snapped. "Let's hear the rest of the story."

"Well, it wasn't more than a few minutes before the first kitty came prowling and found 101 stuffing his cheeks full of grain. Fortunately, it's pretty hard for even a cat to walk quietly across a layer of grain on a stone floor -- 101 heard it coming and had time to escape, finding safety in a crevice, up in between the legs of a statue of one of their goddesses."

"So a pussy on stone chased him into a..." 45 began, before Mar cut him off, yelling "Hey! Watch your mouth rat-boy!"

"Yeah, well, it seems the statue was of their fertility goddess, Bastet." 3.14 continued, sniggling. "You just can't make this stuff up!" 45 chimed in."

"And so there was 101, trapped in the statue's 'asset' and screaming at the cat, when the old priest came in and had what turned out to be an historic misunderstanding of what was taking place."

"Do tell!" Mar prompted.

"Well, you see, it seems 101 was yelling 'Get away from me, you bastard! You bastard!' But to the old Egyptian, in the tinny echo of the room, it seemed as if the statue was proclaiming the cat to be 'Bastet' -- which he reported to his people in due course."

"Bastard, Bastet. Potato, po-tah-toe. Works for me!" 45 was enjoying 3.14's story to the max.

"So how did this 'misunderstanding' result in the extermination of so many cats?" Athena asked.

"Because ritual sacrifice of a deity played a large part in ancient Egyptian religion," 14/2 explained, "once they'd come to believe cats were the embodiment of Bastet..."

"...they sacrificed them by the thousands." 3.14 finished.

"All thanks to our friend 101 and his 'potty mouth'!" 45 concluded, chucking softly.

"Yeah, well...I didn't mean..." 101 stammered in embarrassment.

"What you did or didn't mean is irrelevant." Mar broke in, satisfied to have finally heard the whole story and, obviously, looking to move on. "It's all history at this point anyway. Just be glad you got out with your hide intact." And with that, Mar and the rest began to rise from the table.

"Wait a minute." Athena broke in, speaking directly to 3.14 "You said in your message you were going to try and reverse 101's effects on history -- what happened there?" Now it was 3.14's turn to suddenly look embarrassed. "Well, um...ur..." he stalled.

"He went to the old priest and tried to explain what really happened." 101 continued the story. "And the old priest was so shocked at the appearance of a talking rat -- well, let's just say cats didn't end up being the only creatures to be mistaken for gods incarnate!"